Perfection

Have you noticed that the world doesn’t necessarily conform to your definition of  perfection.  Our problem with the common definition of perfection is that it’s based on our personal opinions.  We decide what is good and bad and we use those benchmarks to define perfection as we see it.  Regardless of what we think, perfection is a state in which what is, is and what isn’t, isn’t.   

The questions are, what does it take to think of perfection in the context of my definition above?  And why bother anyway?  I’ll answer the second question first:  Because when you do accept “what is” you will feel a great deal more peace and contentment in this life.

The question of “what does it take” is a bit more complicated.  It takes learning the difference between “acceptance” and “agreement’.  If I thought that I had to agree with everything I accept as it is, I would have a problem with the definition too.  But I don’t.

I try to accept but not necessarily agree with the world’s many failings.  And no matter how much I disagree with the world the way it is, it will continue to be the way it is. 

Here’s two good exercises in acceptance:  Go outside on a clear night and complain loudly that you don’t like the way the stars are arranged.  See what happens.  Then go to the busiest street in town and determine which way the majority of traffic is flowing.  Then shout out, “everyone go that way”.  I hope you notice that the stars won’t change and that traffic is already going that way.  Are they following your directions or are you just recognizing and accepting what is?

Okay, in neither case are you in control of what’s happening.  That’s the world where perfection lives.  It does what it does and it doesn’t do what it doesn’t do, regardless of  your expectations.  So in my view, our expectations of the world only serve to upset us.  I’m not saying don’t have expectations of yourself.  Although, very often, we set ourselves up to fail.  I am saying that acceptance of what is (and isn’t), is the first step of living a more fulfilled and contented life.

Our opinions about perfection are usually shaped by our morals, which usually come from our religions.  In monotheistic religions, only God is perfect.  And “He” is not of the natural world.  If you still insist on a moral basis for your definition of perfection think of it this way:  Evil exists in a world made by the Creator who is “perfect’.  How could “He”?  I think the answer has something to do with the fact that we’re imposing our personal expectations on the world and “He” accepts it the way it is.  You see in my definition (and in the real world), perfection includes imperfection.  How could it not?      

I’m not saying that we shouldn’t try to live virtuous lives: I’m saying that when we admit and accept our imperfections we can use more energy to do so.     

Most of the great prophets knew that once we’ve accepted what is, we free up energy to work toward changing what we disagree with.  Of course with the full acceptance of another fact:  None of us will ever be fully successful in that endeavor. 

If we can’t accept that fact too, we’ll wear ourselves out and we won’t have much left to apply to what we don’t like about the world.  So use your energy to resist things the way they are and frustrate yourself or accept them as they are and have the energy to help make things better.  It’s your choice:  The only one that really matters.  And it’s the only one that you have any real control over.  If you don’t believe me, go out there and keep shouting at those stars until they change formation.

Robert DeFilippis